*ahem*
Oh you may not think I'm pretty,
But don't go on what you see;
I'll choke myself if you can find
A buzzer better than me.
You can keep your Judges black,
Your Zeecrafts with their lights
For I'm the quizbowl Gordian Knot
And I'm the best by rights.
There's nothing hidden in your buzz
The QuizWizard can't hear,
So make a buzz and I'll tell you
Which way you ought to steer.
You might belong among the TRASH,
Where play the real street-smart,
Their movies, sports, and TV shows
Set TRASH players apart.
You might go to NAQT,
Where they are fair and true,
The power and the well-timed game
Are what appeal to you.
Or yet belong in ACF,
If you've a ready mind,
You've read Benet's, you know your stuff,
And your ass you can find.
Or perhaps in CBI
You'll make your real friends.
Professional and businesslike,
There you'll achieve your ends.
So make a buzz! Don't be afraid!
Just show me what you've got;
You're in good hands (though I have none)
For I'm the Gordian knot.