<HUMOR> Turns out that CBI's financial difficulties are over, according to United Press International. Microsoft recently bought the troubled company, saying that "CBI's policy of copyrighting most everything in existence fits in well with our current business strategy". Microsoft has recently told colleges and universities across North America that, unless they buy new intramural packets at a price double that of last year's, they will be last in line to receive new tournament announcements. Microsoft has also stated that current buzzer systems and clocks won't work with its new batches of questions, and that needing to start a new round every so often because of question failure is "perfectly normal". In other news, Sun Microsystems acquired substantial interests in ACF. Sun CEO Scott McNeally stated that ACF's policy of hating CBI "merged well" with Sun's hatred of Microsoft, along with the fact that both systems, while they seem to be liked well by afficianados, appear incomprehensible to most. Linus Torvalds also became acting CEO of NAQT, pledging to eliminate server crashes instantly. Linux followers immediately headed over to NAQT, which has quickly emerged as a bright new challenger to CBI/Microsoft, despite the fact that people have the same amount of trouble understanding power tossups and power matching as programming Linux. In other financial news, the executive board of TRASH each bought themselves an Etch-A-Sketch and an Atari 2600. </HUMOR>
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