Andy, Hayden, The truth is that both of you want people to cope with these things in the same way that you do. Andy says, "I was two blocks away. You all know I freaked out. I am calm now. I am working now. I have allowed time to march on. Please, everyone, do the same." He says he is, but I don't think he really is. He's being narrow and focused because that's what allows him to get through the day without freaking out. People find security in the routine and everyday. Andy, in what I am sure he will acknowledge is his less than clear usual way, is trying to say that he wants to feel safe by reestablishing routine. He's not saying that he wants people to forget. Hayden says, "To mourn the exceptional loss of life is not to sympathize - it is to grieve." I don't think Hayden's need to grieve has to do with where he works, but with the kind of person he is. He would feel the same way, were he working in a Starbucks in Wyoming. His employment may make it felt more bit personal than would otherwise be the case. I suppose I feel bad that I've spent the past few days mostly watching people react, because that's what I do. The responses are varied. Some people are outward-oriented, seeking comfort in vigils and public expressions of grief and support. Others are inward-oriented, seeking comfort in whatever they can find within themselves. I've seen people express themselves in manners resembling both Andy and Hayden and many shades in between. I've done a survey of websites which have shut down in what they consider an appropriate sign of respect, some relatively high traffic sites in all industries (yes, even that industry). Most high-traffic Usenet groups have long threads on the incidents. I've monitored a school Usenet group where the only posts on the day of the attacks were questions on whether or not classes would be cancelled. I could go on and on....
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