Coping and grieving (1/2)

We have all been affected by this tragedy on
different levels. Some of us have lost friends and/or loved
ones, and many of us, I suspect, are still hoping for
the best while fearing the
worst.

Unfortunately, there are no rules to go by in terms of
determining what is an appropriate response to this grief,
and what goes too far. It will take time, but
eventually, we all will need to move on: we need to start
rebuilding at some point, and resuming our normal state of
affairs.

And, while the general mood is still somber in many
places, at some point, we will all need to start bringing
joy, humor, and beauty back into our lives. If we
insist on wallowing in our misery, then we are handing
victory to the people who committed this
outrage.

Obviously, certain aspects of what may be the first truly
national mourning period in US history are not under our
control: whether sporting games are cancelled, what TV
shows will air, and so on. But, to the extent that we
do have choices, criticizing others for how they
choose to cope with this tragedy is at best
inappropriate: some people complained that many teenagers were
making macabre or off-color jokes about this tragedy. To
be honest, I've seen it myself on the wards;
"gallows humor" is a defense mechanism.

So, if you
still need to grieve, do so; if you are ready to move
on, do so. But don't yell at people who disagree with
you.

--STI

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